Dead Rebels

tributes to cultural martyrs

Bill Clinton Carries Barack Obama’s Nuclear Warning to Kim Jong il  

Article by Karen Fish

The cheque is in the mail. Michael Jackson was normal. I did not have sexual relations with that woman. Bill Clinton just flew all the way to Pyongyang and met with Kim Jong il to secure the release of a Korean journalist and a Taiwanese journalist. Like Bill Clinton, the United Nations Special Envoy to Haiti and aspirant to future head of the United Nations had nothing better to do today.

The past few weeks have been bad for Iranian jounalists detained in Tehran. They shoot the messengers don't they Nada? Don't'cha? Kim Jong il is about to die and he wants to live on forever in infamy and to go out with a bang. Many people believe that the dinosaurs and the herpesores went extinct 50 million years ago when an asteroid hit our home Earth, and an ice age covered our tiny ball planet except for the equator region.

These people have obviously not heard Bill and Hillary Clinton's song "Bang a Gong (Get it ON) by T. Rex, here: "Well you're dirty and sweet clad in black don't look back and I love you, you're dirty and sweet oh yah. Well you're slim and you're weak, you got the teeth of the Hydra upon you, you're dirty sweet and you're my girl, Get it on, bang a gong, get it on. Get it on, bang a gong, get it on."

In Greek Mythology the foul breathed nine headed monster Hydra lived in Lake Lerna. Let sleeping Hydras lay. What is the name of the football play where the quarterback pretends to hand off to O.J. Simpson, the defense all swarms the running back in his jail cell and the quarterback throws the winning touchdown into the endzone? Why is the United States the world's biggest polluter and the only country on Earth that doesn't go nuts over soccer?

So Bill Clinton flew to North Korea to rescue Al Gore's journalists on Current TV and from twelve years of hard labor? Twelve years does sound like an awfully long labor. Under Lake Lerna was the passage to the Underworld, or Afterlife. The Hydra was the guardian of the passage, the gatekeeper. Robert Gates was the Secretary of Defense under George Bush and remained the Secretary of Defense under Barack Obama. Obviously both parties are happy with him. If you're happy and you know it clap your hands.

Last week Hillary Clinton called Kim Jong il 'an attention seeking unruly teenager.' Kim Jong il replied that Hillary Clinton was 'ignorant and dressed like a pensioner going shopping.' Did President Clinton fly to Pyongyang to repair the rift between his wife and Kim Jong il? The official North Korean Commie State Media, CSM, reported that Bill Clinton met with Kim Jong il and delivered a message from Barack Obama.

Robert Gibbs on behalf of Barack Obama denied this. North Korea bans religion and Dear Leader Kim Jong il must be worshipped as God, like the Roman Emperors. Kim Jong il created the Universe? This is the question Katie Couric should have asked Sarah Palin. According to Sarah Palin the Earth is 6,000 years old because that is what the Bible says and the dinosaurs were here 6,000 years ago. Sarah Palin has now left Alaska to head up NASA.

George Bush refused to speak one on one with North Korea, which is providing nuclear technology and missiles to Iran, which is planning to nuclear arm its armies Hamas and Hezbollah. Why not Al Qaeda? That would make things interesting.

Last week in Bangkok First Lady and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said, prior to the regional security meeting in Phuket, "The threat I have worried about first and foremost is the proliferation of nuclear weapons and weapons of mass destruction. So obviously we are very concerned about North Korea and recent reports about their dealings with Burma (and Iran and Syria)."

Doesn't it make sense to go and talk with someone and say, "Please stop building nuclear bombs and missiles and selling them, or we will be forced to nuke your eyes out", before just nuking their eyes out? When you have this conversation with a person at least there is the chance that they will listen, before you have to contaminate the whole tiny ball Earth hurtling through space with radioactive fallout. Blessed are the peacemakers.

The Romans borrowed the Greek Gods and renamed them, and Hercules was the Roman name for the Greek God Heracles, a built version of Brad Pitt, the son of Zeus. Hare today gone tomorrow. Hercules had twelve labors. Ouch. Hercules second labor was to cut off the Hydra's heads and he placed the one immortal head under a rock; then he dipped his arrows in the Hydra's poisonous blood to make his arrows more lethal. The problem was that when Hercules used the poison arrow to kill the centaur Nessus, it poisoned the river Anigrus and made all of the fish of the river inedible, like ours will be in the event of a radioactive nuclear war, not that they are so pure today from our burning coal and oil.

Prior to nuking Sodom and Gomorrah God of Mount Sinai aka God the Father, Jesus Christ, The Holy Spirit, Allah, Hashem, Elohim, I Am, Yehovah, Adonai, God sent an angel to tell the only righteous man, Lot, to leave town with his wife and his two virgin daughters. God told them that they would be safe, unless they looked back, and curiosity killed the cat, and when Lot's wife looked back, God turned her into a pillar of salt.

Now that there were only 3 people left on Earth, Lot's daughters gave their father a glass of wine and went into his tent to sleep with him. Lot didn't recognize them, even thought they were his daughters, and even though they were the only other two people left on Earth. This story has seemed hard to believe for three thousand years until this week when Ryan O'Neal tried to pick up his estranged daughter Tatum at Farrah Fawcett's funeral because she looked hot and Ryan didn't recognize her.

So what was Barack Obama's secret message to Kim Jong il, delivered through his homing pigeon Bill Clinton? At least they're talking. It will take an awfully big fire hydrant to put out the raging world wide fires of global warming and nuclear world war III. Get it on, bang a gong, and get a long. How long does a relationship last with no communication? This may or may not be the dawning of the age of Aquarius but we are definitely headed in the right direction.

About the Author

Karen Fish is a writer currently living in Los Angeles, California.The Temple of Love - The World Peace Religion

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